A crisis as described by Lifeline is when someone has a personal reaction to an event or experience in their life they find hard to cope with.

In my lifetime so far…I’ve had quite a few crisis’s and each time you survive, you feel stronger yet question why the hell you had to go through it. In time you will reflect of them and yourself to help clarify things but there will always be unanswered questions.

Recently I’ve been facing another crisis and it’s been tough. I heard a woman on a TV program the other day going through something similar who said “I feel sorry for people without children as my child is what keeps me going – what do they have?”

My son is my reason, my rock, my everything and he is my purpose. He is why I get up in the morning, why I work so hard to do all I can to provide for him and create opportunities for our survival even if I get knocked down and at times fail.

There are other factors that have assisted in my purpose, my strength, my being, my courage, the occasional smile and the snippets of positiveness. These factors are simple and sometimes small but in the scheme of things they are HUGE.

‘It’s the simple things that mean the most!’

I’m sure many of you can relate. Possibly you’ve got a family who has offered to pay a bill or help with rent. Maybe you’ve had a Mum who does what she can by offering you love and affection and may help to pay for your child’s school camp and medication. I’m sure you’ve had at some point a best friend who feels she isn’t doing much but the fact she is calling every second day to check on you is more than you could ever ask for.

What about when your fridge broke down in the midst of this crisis and the refrigeration mechanic after spending time chatting takes some money off the amount he quoted you. He tells you to spend it on something else. You do.  You buy that part for the vacuum finally and can now clean your house and doesn’t it look and feel fabulous.

Maybe it’s the random phone call or the out of the blue gesture that helps you feel real, human, alive and grateful. It could be that dear friend who shouts you a coffee or offers you a day’s work more often than normal just to give you that extra cash to help you through.

It is the simple things that can make you smile even if it is for a moment. The simple things that help you feel loved and cared for.

For the simple things that mean so much – THANK YOU – you know who you are! xo

Centrelink supports…REALLY?

This week unfortunately I’ve had to register with Centrelink as my circumstances are dire and I’m out of work.

Just over a year ago the ‘Single Parenting Pension’ changed to a new system called ‘Newstart Allowance’ thanks to the former government. Why they decided to get rid of it is totally beyond me, however, what I do know is that it screwed me over and as far as I believe pretty much every other single parent that relied on it.

I dealt with it and fortunately I managed without it and actually had a better financial year than I ever had due to working hard with various jobs and managing my money very well.

Now, I’m back having to use the system again but this time it’s different. After today, I now understand…I don’t think I’ll ever understand it actually but I am aware of how the ‘new’ system works and to be honest I feel shock and in disarray.

Firstly I called Centrelink to find out more of what I had to do, as I needed financial help while I look for work, I have no income coming in. I was told I had to apply via the application form online…everything now is online.

I applied online answering various questions and then had to book in an appointment with ‘Employment Plus – Salvation Army’, which is basically a recruitment agency assigned by the government. The next available appointment was the following week and in the meantime I am waiting to be sent a profit and loss form that I need to fill out (due to my Sole Trading history) which I need to upload online before my 14 day application timeframe ends. Mind you, each time I have tried to upload paperwork as required it hasn’t worked and you end up in the office wasting half a day for someone to be free to hand the forms in….anyways.

Today I had my appointment with a really lovely lady who was sympathetic and helpful as best she could be. It was explained to me that I am in band 1, which means I am ‘independently looking’ for work. I am to apply for maximum 10 jobs via proof using a form, which is handed in fortnightly and this will continue for 14 weeks (unless I find work). After this time, I am to return to Employment Plus to check in and will continue to check in once a month for half an hour at a time. After 52 weeks, yes that’s right 52 WEEKS if still unemployed only then will Employment Plus assist me in looking for work.

If we look on Centrelink’s website, the description for the ‘Newstart Allowance’ says,

            “Financial help if you are looking for work. It supports you while you do  activities that may increase your chances of finding a job.”

What support are they offering me to help increase my chances of finding a job? Bloody nothing!

The lady from Employment Plus advised after explaining to her in confidence that I have been feeling very depressed and desperate that there is another possible option. The lady said I could use this ‘depression’ to get extra assistance by moving me to the next band of 2 which would mean I could get more financial assistance with travel for interviews, clothes to wear to interviews if needed (it’s not) and more importantly assistance in finding work.

To be able to get to this band, I need to have my GP warrant a medical certificate declaring I am ‘depressed’. I then have to bring this certificate back with me to Employment Plus, have an appointment with Centrelink who will book in an evaluation to assess my depression and to bring along any evidence of my depression to help back up my claim.


I left my appointment feeling supported emotionally by this lady who really was sympathetic to my cause and almost disgruntled at the system that she had to abide by but I was quite numb. I soon became quite angry and still now am in shock at this ‘new’ system.

The government complains about ‘bludgers’ and how much people like me are costing the country. There are general folk and many I know have this opinion and are quick to stereotype and label those like me in a similar position as free loaders and are in some minds a waste of space.

There probably are people out there who deserve the labelling and I’ve known a few I can tell you. BUT, I don’t and there are thousands like me who hate that they’re in this position but have no choice.

When I found out today the government has the means and resources to help people like myself to find work but they don’t is astonishing. The fact that there is other agencies like Employment Plus around the country contracted by the government and yet their purpose is not utilised until after a 52 week waiting period is gobsmacking bloody pathetic.

The lovely lady who helped me today is from New Zealand and explained that our system was backwards to her hometown. Their system apparently is that if someone finds himself or herself out of work, they go to these agencies that help them find work prior to actually applying for benefits. This makes sense to me – does it to you? Why can we not adopt the same system? Imagine how much money the country would save and the reduction in unemployment!

As I wait to see if I am approved for the ‘Newstart Allowance’ I pray that I will not require it for long or the ‘assistance’ by Centrelink.

Happy New Year!!!

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Happy New Year to all!

May this coming new year be filled with much happiness, ease, peace, smiles, snuggles and most of all love.

I will be bringing in the new year with my divine little soul – my son. This will be our first NYE together since he was a baby and I can’t wait to share this one with him. 2013 has been an extremely testing year for me, and I would have to say one of the hardest to date I have had to deal with.  I feel quite positive about 2012 with it representing my last year of study; my son finishes primary school;  my determination and motivation to get healthy, and well again and to turn fat into fab. I am also taking on the lessons I have learnt this past year and know I am now stronger than ever before.

If we only have one person in our lives that loves and supports us, I feel we are extremely fortunate, let alone if we have more. I am personally surrounded by the most amazing, inspirational, loving, caring, supportive people and I truly feel blessed. I would not be doing all I do and succeeding the way I am without such people in my life. I would like to publicly thank each and every one of you who has touched my heart, my soul and has helped carry me, love me and support me in this last year.

I would like to wish all of you a fantastic start to the new chapter in our lives and one year ends and another begins.  If we can all try and live in peace, do one to others as we would like done to us and cherish all the lessons we are thrown to manage, I feel this world we live in would be such an amazing place.

Love, light and peace until the new year.

Take care of each other – give that extra special someone another hug and bring on 2012.

Shelly xo